Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The Gloves Are Coming Off

AND I QUOTE from my Nephew's blog: The Ballad of Dimes McDropperson
Rather than comment on his blog, I decided to bring this to where people other than family actually visit.

When Christopher Columbus and Amerigo Vespuccio brought spices to the new world from the West Indies, they left strict instructions to not give any to Ginger. This would explain the 45 years of supplying endless, bland, carboard-like meals.

This coming from someone whose odometer miles mainly register the distance between home, McDonald's, Wendy's and Subway. I'm sure compared to the mega salted fries and foot long offerings, my meals do seem a little bland. Although I'm not sure what a CARboard meal tastes like. Cardboard perhaps. *lol* AND...unlike Bingo the Dog, Amerigo VESPUCCI did not end with an O. Still, we are very proud of your GED and the fact that you furthered your education with that online degree from Pig Trot U.

Your presence was sorely missed at Thanksgiving. We all commented on how nice it was to actually have LEFTOVERS. Rather than watch your incessant gnawing on the ham bone, I was able to bring it home and make a pot of beans. Of course, when we enjoyed them, we all joked at how, if you were home, we wouldn't be able to stay in the room with you once your gaseous 'crop dusting' started. I never thought I would miss your farts and belching, but it's just way to quiet here without you.

For those who don't know, Adam is in Iraq, working for KBR. Where else can you earn an exorbitant wage for stapling, sorting and filing. Who knew that Pig Trot degree would prove so valuable. All kidding aside...I admire him for what he does. It takes a rare person to brave venturing into dangerous territory to seek employment...and desperate women. *sorry, couldn't resist*. What we do miss most about Ad is his sense of humor and fun spirit. I hope you'll all visit his blog and leave a comment. Don't mind the obscene finger waving behind his smiling face

Now I'm off to try to find something to send him for Christmas. What can you send someone who has 22 pairs of $l00 jeans, 95 humorous tee shirts, and more underwear than the whole KBR unit can wear in a month? I'm just not sure I can send a blow-up doll to an APO. *ba boom* Okay..that was my last parting shot. Love you Adam!

3 comments:

Dimes McDropperson said...

God Dammit..... Obviously I failed my typing class at Pig Trot U...

:)

Very funny Ging...

Dimes Abides....

Oh yeah.... YOU'RE GOING DOWN!!!!

Ginger Simpson said...

Hey...watch the language. This blog is rated G for good taste. :)

Auntie G

Jones said...

Okay...I'm late.
But I read both of your blogs and actually chuckled out loud.

And that's pretty impressive since I am so incredibly funny, and rarely find anyone else humorous.

Oh, and Mom, you had better proof read your own stuff before you criticize...you used the improper form of "too" in your response to Adam.

But then again, I'm perfect.

Love and miss you both,
S.

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