Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter!
Can you believe it? Today I'm being interviewed by none other than that Klutzy News reporter, Ms. Quotes.
But don't worry, fans and fiends...er, I mean, fans and friends, heh heh. She's nowhere as nosy as your nosiest Pukelitzer Award winning journalist.
Uh, that's me, by the way.
So, welcome, Ms. Quotes, and let's see if you know how to handle that microphone.
MQ: Mr. Nosey, why is your name spelled to include that “e”?
NOSEY: It’s catchy and it certainly caught your attention, heh heh.
MQ: Why does your site still include “blogspot”? Shouldn’t you have your own domain by now?
NOSEY: Yeah, I wondered that too. But every time I ask my boss, Gander, he sends emails with: ‘Prove you’re worth the cost.’
MQ: Tell us why anyone should schedule an I.B. Nosey interview.
NOSEY: Because they’re fun! They’re original! They’re unusual! And because I’m the hippest interviewer in all of cyberspace. Plus, I always force— er, supply an autographed fan photo as an extra incentive.
MQ: You’ve been compared to the likes of Inspector Clouseau. How do you feel about that?
NOSEY: I dunno. Who’s Clouseau?
MQ: A question about your blazers—
NOSEY: Classy, huh? Heh heh. These are going to be collector items one day.
MQ: You never appear without your microphone. Why is that?
NOSEY: It’s how I’m drawn, so it’s kinda attached to me.
MQ: Explain how you became the spokesman for Gum Drop Island confectionary plantation.
NOSEY: Who better? I’m a pro at dealing with the public. To get the word out about Gum Drop Island, the job called for someone -as my bio states- who’s ‘fluent of tongue-in-cheek’.
MQ: And what does ‘fluent of tongue-in-cheek’ mean?
NOSEY: Beats me. I just read the lines they give me, lady.
MQ: You talk non-stop about winning the Pukelitzer. Wouldn’t you rather be considered for the Pulitzer?
NOSEY: Hey. It’s all the one and same.
MQ: Any last words you’d care to share with your reading public?
NOSEY: You bet 'cha. Aren’t you…Feeling Nosey?
***Voice from overhead speaker***:
VOICE: Nosey, your interview is finished. You're wanted elsewhere.
NOSEY: Huh? What? Who are you?
VOICE: This is your author. I'm prepping Gander's helicopter to wing you over to Hush-Hush Island. Scram!
VOICE: Don't argue. You're to meet new characters, fun characters, maybe even dangerous ones. I haven't decided yet.
NOSEY: *gasps* Dangerous! You can't. You just can't!
VOICE: Don't tell me what I can't do with you, mister. I'm writing up a Dr. Cold Finger as we speak.
VOICE: Didn't you hear me? I said scram! Besides, the "Blonde" is waiting.
NOSEY: *gulps* B-blonde?
VOICE: Signing off now, Nosey. On our next installment, you will be somewhere far, far away. Bwahahahah *gives evil laugh*
**NOTICE:** The "Blonde" and her adventures will be written by author Connie Vines.
Learn more about I.B. Nosey and Gum Drop Island in our book, cleverly titled "Ahoy, Gum Drop!"
Also, visit Nosey's blog. Because, after all, aren't you...Feeling Nosey?