Lisa: I'm here in the huge and dazzling designer kitchen of Frannie Myers, a main character in my sizzling mystery novel, A Grand Seduction. Frannie's going to show us how to prepare Quiche, and believe me when I say that NOBODY knows their way around a kitchen like my Fran. Hi, Fran!
Frannie: Hey, glad to be here...and you should like my kitchen, you're the one who designed it! Hey, what do you mean, MYSTERY novel? Why, what's going to happen?
Lisa: ::whistles:: Uh, nothing. Ooh, nice blender! So, um, about QUICHE...
Frannie: Yes! I had to learn how to make this when my husband insisted on a stupid dinner party and failed to mention that some of the guests didn't eat meat until right before everyone arrived. Should have suckered, er, divorced the cad sooner.
Lisa: Um actually, he did say...never mind. So, how do we begin?
Frannie: Well, we can't start with the beginning, since we're here in the kitchen, not my walk in closet.
Lisa: Closet? Why do we need a closet to make quiche?
Frannie: For the footwear, of course!
Lisa: You lost me.
Frannie: ::sigh:: Cooking is ALL about the right shoes. Manolos are great for meat dishes; Jimmy Choos for whipping up a quick salad...
Lisa: Er, of course. Everyone knows that. ::rolls eyes::
Maybe we should just skip ahead to the preparation?
Frannie: Okay. First, you need a pie crust. My friend Twyla knows how to make it from scratch...ooh, should I call her up and ask?
Lisa: No, that's okay. I see you've got a premade. Interesting choice for a cooking show.
Frannie: Gotta love store bought. Anyway, then you need eggs ... ::cracks them directly into pie crust::
Lisa (frowning): Uh, Fran? Shouldn't you break those into a bowl first or something?
Frannie: A bowl? Don't be silly. Quiche bakes in a crust. Why wash a bowl?
Frannie: ::fishes around:: Uh, crap, they're slippery little devils.
::wipes hands, shrugs:: Oh well, it won't hurt anything. With the other stuff in here, noone will notice.
Lisa: I guess. Extra calcium, right? So what else?
Frannie: Then some half and half cream, ::splash/drip::
...some onions I bought already chopped, ::plunk/splotch::
... and a package of either Swiss or gruyere cheese. ::THUNK::
Lisa: Isn't the cheese supposed to be grated?
Frannie: Good grief, how tough you wanna make this? It's going to MELT, you know...no one will know what shape it started out in.
Lisa: ...if you say so.
::Jumps in shock:: GOD! What on earth are those slabs of dessicated black stuff? Some rare, freeze-dried worm? Rotten tree bark? What's that horrid smell coming off it?
Fran: Geez, Lisa, you sure don't know much about cooking. This is BACON, obviously, that I cooked earlier. ::crumbles into the crust, wipes hands:: There! All ready to go.
::heels click-click in stacatto fashion across the marble floor::
Fran: ...and, into the oven for forty minutes. WAIT! Lisa, where are you going? Aren't you going to stay for the taste test?
Lisa: ::gulp:: Uh, sorry...I just remembered I left my Pepto Bismol at home.
So, there you have it, Frannie's own SPECIAL recipe for quiche. Try it and you'll wonder why you ever ate store bought. :)
Lisa Logan is a romance author of two published novels and an award winning short story author. She is also the Senior Acquisitions Editor for Eternal Press. For more info on Lisa, Frannie, and A Grand Seduction, visit LisaLogan.net.